In the year 2013…

Dec 28, 2012, 2:40 PM | Updated: 3:00 pm

In the year 2013…

Kevin Towers will make a trade that, like an M. Night Shyamalan movie, will confuse us then excite us and ultimately leave us unsatisfied with its results. Thus is life with “The Gambler.”

In the year 2013…

ASU’s Men’s Basketball team will answer the age-old question “if a team plays well but nobody is there to see it does it really count?” They’ll discover it doesn’t as they win 19 games and miss the NCAA Tournament.

In the year 2013…

Greg Jamison will buy the Coyotes and promptly change the name from Phoenix to Arizona. Like the Cardinals after they made the same change in 1994, they’ll finish .500. Unfortunately for Coyotes fans, their record will be 0-0 thanks to the lockout.

In the year 2013…

The Cardinals will fire a key member of their staff, mess up their high first round draft pick and find an inadequate starting quarterback who will play behind a sub-par offensive line. Once again fans will say “same ol’ Cardinals.”

(Editors Note: This is the same prediction used for 1994, 1996, 2000, 2003, 2007.)

In the year 2013…

Larry Fitzgerald will sit courtside at a Suns game in hopes of catching a pass from Goran Dragic just to remember what it feels like. Dragic will throw it to Andre Roberts who is sitting in the second row instead.

In the year 2013…

In a “Finkle is Einhorn, Einhorn is Finkle” type twist, it’s revealed that Phoenix Fan X is really a woman who is a recovering FOX Sports Arizona Girl just looking for a place to show her true self.

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In the year 2013…