For example, does Bill Belichick really need Tim Tebow? Absolutely not. Does Coach Belichick want Tebow-mania? We think so.

And, hey, we're darn near almost seriously serious here. I mean, what does Belichick enjoy almost as much as winning football games?

That's easy -- beating the media at its own game.

Hence, everybody huddle up because here's Belichick's game plan as we see it: invite Tebow Nation to town, very well knowing that the media will bring the all-out blitz.

Then, when the questions come flying off the edge with impunity, simply hit your check-downs by answering every single pointed question with (not-so) enlightening responses.

"Anything we do is what we feel is in the best interest of the team. Tim is a talented player who's smart and works hard. So, we'll see how it goes," said Coach Buzzkill in a cadence that would flatline on a heart monitor.

Then, when the media posed the seemingly innocuous question regarding what position Tebow might play?

"We're going to do what we think is best for our football team. So, I don't know. We'll see," Belichick shrugged.

Wait -- one more question from the assembled media, including 15 television cameras. Alas, it is met with one more non-answer.

"I think we've already talked enough about him," Belichick responded with his jaw barely moving, as if the future Hall of Fame coach was a ventriloquist. "We'll see how he does and just go from there."

Just don't go there, if you're the media. Meaning, don't persist with the Tebow questions, capisce?

In fact, come the second day of mini-camp, Belichick attempted to answer the Tebow question one last time (with one last non-answer): "Like I said, we're not going to get into a minute-by-minute evaluation of a player. I don't think that's the way to go, especially at this time of year."

Look, there's nothing more that the media wants than Tebow sound bites, tidbits and factoids. And there's nothing that Belichick seemingly enjoys more than foiling the needs and wants of the media. Right now, he has more blocks than Calais Campbell.

And guess what? It's highly entertaining.

In fact, the only thing missing is Belichick in a white chef's outfit playing the role of the Soup Nazi on Seinfeld.

Sure. The media poses a question and Belichick barks out "No Tebow for you!"

Really?! Can you watch a sporting event and not have a rooting interest? Sit down on the couch or in a bleacher seat and not pull for either team? I mean, isn't that what separates the game experience from watching the symphony, for example?

If so, then this NBA Finals matchup is quickly becoming yet another example of how I'm morphing into my father. Heck, after two games, I might as well have a ticket to the opera.

Oh, I'm watching and appreciating the NBA Finals. In fact, I consider it appointment viewing. One of the few viewing experiences left that I deem above and beyond the DVR.

But if you hooked up a heart monitor, I'd need the paddles. Ask me to feel something for either the Heat or the Spurs - I'd flat line. ("Clear!")

Simply put, I still can't bring myself to pull for the Heat or Spurs. In Miami, they assembled a dream team. As opposed to being built and earned through acumen and sweat equity, the Heat were more colluded, conspired and premeditated. Where's the true accomplishment in that?

As for the Spurs, well, residing here in the A-Z the past two decades guarantees automatic apathy, if not outright disgust. That goes unsaid, right?

I mean, cheering for San Antonio would be akin to cheering for the IRS. What? Would you actually pull for either one to take more from us? No chance.

So, again, I just can't do it. Cheer, that is. Team LeBron versus Team Antiquated is compelling theater, no doubt. (Note: you ever notice how when the Spurs win -- they're "veterans." When the Spurs lose, their roster is comprised of "old guys.")

It's like when you were a kid at the dinner table and Mom orders you to make a choice: eat the cauliflower or the Brussels Sprouts. "Period, young man!"

Alas, incapable of making a choice, you just stare at the dinner plate in horror. And stare. And stare…

Or wait, is Bud still stuck in the year 2000?

How else would you explain the dichotomy that has baseball claiming it's trying to rid the game of cheaters. All the while, MLB is cheating its fans.

What's my biggest takeaway from the highly entertaining D-backs series in St. Louis? Glad you asked. Turns out, the unfortunate truth is that the most memorable moment happens to be the third base umpire from Tuesday night. Not because the rookie ump blatantly blew a call that got bench coach Alan Trammell ejected.

No, the unforgettable part is just how easy it would've been to get the call correct. That is, if MLB used replay. Instead, the blown call led directly to a blown lead. The extended inning ultimately helped result in extra innings.

The unforgivable part is that everyone can see for themselves that the call was botched el grande. Again, everyone with the ability to see replay. And, these days, that happens to be everyone on the planet except the men in blue.

Baseball is failing its fans by failing to put replay into play. With too many egregious episodes to count already this season, the "cheating" is so epic that we're darn-near approaching another Black Sox scandal.

Let's be clear, there is nothing charming about blown calls. If you want to honor the venerable game itself and preserve its rich history (#Ding), then install an old-time baseball organ. That's charming.

What's not fetching is how MLB never hesitates to embrace and adopt cutting-edge technology when it comes to advertising. Funny how that works, eh?

Innovations like LED facia signage are incorporated immediately into the stadiums. Why? Because LED equals ROI -- return on investment. As (fake HBO) pitcher Kenny Powers might say -- "dollar, dollar bill$, y'all."

MLB attendance has been fading, just like the credibility of its umpires. You can't tell Paulie Pine Tar there isn't a direct correlation. What's wrong with umpires using that old phrase in baseball -- "lil' help over here?!"

Because, even though baseball is still a long ways away, if you don't have credibility, then you don't have a sport. You have WWE wrestling.

In other words, another pastime known for PEDs and cheating.

No joke. And that's no slam on the Suns. Instead, it illustrates that there's no slam dunk in this year's NBA Draft.

To be kind, the upcoming draft class is underwhelming. In fact, I asked new Suns GM Ryan McDonough what he says when people say it's a weak crop overall?

"I understand why people say that," McDonough nodded. "But, for us, we only have three picks. So, we don't need there to be 60 good players in this draft. We just need there to be three (good players) at the slots we're picking."

In contrast, the incoming freshmen class of college basketball players is outstanding. With the likes of heralded prep stars like Andrew Wiggins (Kansas), considered perhaps the best pure prospect since LeBron, not to mention the acclaimed Jabari Parker (Duke), forget underwhelming. When you talk about how flush this class is with talent, we might be understating it.

Thing is, the intriguing part comes when you cruise through the various scouting reports documenting this top-heavy freshmen class, you'll find statements such as: "On pure talent, Gordon would be No. 2 on the list."

Yes -- that would be UA recruit Aaron Gordon. Take a quick glance at any of his high school highlight videos online and it's immediately obvious -- Gordon (6-foot-8) is more athletic than any player currently on the Suns roster (all apologies to Shannon Brown & Wes Johnson).

As the MVP of the recent McDonald's All-American game, Gordon finished with 24 pts, 8 rebounds and 9 dunks (Note: there were probably 900 slams in the game overall).

As the first line in the AP game story read: "The anticipated showdown between Jabari Parker and Andrew Wiggins became a sidebar to Aaron Gordon's big night."

Recently, during the UA Road Tour event at Chase Field, I had a chance to chat with Sean Miller. In the wake of Gordon's MVP performance at the McDonald's game, did I ask the ‘Cats coach about his incoming super frosh?

You bet I did. Alas, all Coach Miller would offer was a smile and somewhat reluctant admission that Gordon has a chance to be "special."

Fair enough. We understand a head coach electing not to over-aggrandize, if you will, an incoming recruit.

So, I got on the phone and called a guy who actually asked Paulie Low Tops to serve as best man in his wedding.

Believe it or not, this person is actually of sound mind and (a past-its-prime) body. More importantly, he happens to be a high school head coach in the Bay Area who just spent the past three seasons getting schooled by the prep phenom Aaron Gordon.

"Incredible athlete," said the rival coach when asked for a first-person scouting report. "He's very adept at handling the basketball. He's got guard skills and he's a very good passer. Can play point guard."

"Heck of a rebounder, can block shots, plays above the rim," the coach continued. "(Gordon) shows a lot of poise. Manages his emotions when teams try and get physical, because guys would hammer him. Doesn't have an anger problem. That part I was very impressed by."

"Big question is can he shoot the jump shot? Because he can defend. He can guard 6-2, 6-3 shooters. In the state tourney, he covered a guard. Did a great job (defending) against a guard going to UNLV."

Then, he used the words "lottery pick" and asked if I had any more questions? Uh, no. That pretty much covers it.

Alas, what are the chances the Suns will someday wind up with what UA has now?

Wanna take a look?

The executive conference room was also lacking the perspective of someone who played the game.

Yes, former NBA All-Star Jeff Hornacek was hired to coach the Suns. And, to some degree, Hornacek will also be relied upon to reconnect the team with the fan base, not to mention many of its former players.

But one of the most important aspects of the Hornacek Homecoming is to remember that he wore a jersey for 14 seasons. Why? Because the rest of the Suns' decision makers did not.

Look, just like Hornacek's playing days, that's not a slam. It just means that the Suns' front office filled a need. Basketball is not baseball. Analytics and number crunching don't fit a free-flowing game nearly as well as baseball, for instance.

The 16th head coach in Suns history is unlike GM Ryan McDonough, team president Lon Babby and owner Robert Sarver -- he brings the perspective of someone who logged many minutes on the court.

In other words, we don't know about anybody else currently residing on Planet Orange Cones, but that makes Paulie Low Tops here feel a heck of a lot better about the Suns' chances of recovering and rebuilding from a 25-win season.

Let's hit rewind for a moment. Years ago, I had a few precious opportunities to sit next to Cotton Fitzsimmons. We were both watching a Suns game, but our conversations revealed that the late Suns legend was seeing something above and beyond anybody else on press row. Simply put, he had been there and coached that.

So, just like Babby allowed McDonough to hire his head coach, the new GM will now act like LeBron is barreling down the lane and step aside when it comes time for potential draft picks to visit.

"Jeff and his coaching staff will run the workouts," McDonough said on Arizona Sports 620. "Coming from the NBA where (Hornacek) was an assistant at Utah, I know he was somewhat involved in the draft process there -- but he's going to be more involved (here)."

See, who says the suits can't move the ball and share the rock? Chalk up a few assists for the guys upstairs. It's the front office equivalent of finding the open man and catering to his strengths.

In baseball, it's an illness. And it's slowly killing the game. In the eyes of the masses, all the time spent outside the batter's box turns into wasted time. More than ever, that's time that people feel can (and will be) better spent elsewhere.

Now, have we commissioned some sort of Mitchell Report? No. (Although, if we did, we would eventually read it -- unlike Bud Selig.)

Our data is strictly anecdotal. Frequent encounters with sports fans who feel the need to vent (do I look like Dr. Phil or somethin'? Wait, don't answer that).

Typically, the conversation evolves into the following observation: "I find myself yelling at the game of baseball more than ever."

We're not talking about disagreeing with an ump or a manager. Not even yelling at the airing of concession stand infomercials during key moments in the late innings.

Instead, we're talking about yelling at batters like you're a Marine Corps drill sergeant: "Get back in the box already!" "Don't make me come down there!" "Do you really need to readjust your batting gloves - again?!" "And you definitely don't need to tighten ‘em up after a pitch you didn't even swing at!?!"

The delays are constant. And, for most folks, so is the agony. Yet, here's the thing -- it's all so unnecessary. That's the good news/bad news: baseball can be fixed. But, by failing to force batters to stay in the box, America's Past Its Prime…err, Pastime is cannibalizing itself.

Forget that I'm trying to sell a 6-year-old on the game of baseball. No doubt, it's a challenge to direct his attention towards the TV when the screen inevitably shows batters (and some pitchers) channeling their inner Mike Hargrove (nicknamed "Human Rain Delay" for good reason).

What's really alarming is how many people I speak with (many old enough to remember Mike Hargrove), who grew up with the game, who now report that baseball hasn't grown with them. "I can't take it. I don't watch any more…" is a common refrain that I hear over and over from (former) baseball fans.

Pick up the pace. Step on the gas. And don't change the rule book or the game itself. Simply force the big leaguers to play it.

Believe us Major League Baseball, it's in your best interest. Right now, life is passing you on the right. And you're doing ten miles under the speed limit with your hazards on…

Did the Cardinals need a Pro Bowl quarterback? No. Naturally, every team desires Pro Bowl-caliber play from its QB. But considering the Cardinals featured a stout defense a year ago, an elite QB wasn't an absolute necessity.

Rather, what the Cards really needed was a QB who didn't single-handedly lose the game. Sounds simple. Alas, in truth, not so much.

Instead, if life boils down to wants/needs, the Cards' main priority coming off 2012 revolved around upgrading the QB position so that it's no longer a glaring liability that drains confidence from the rest of the roster.

With this process in mind, Calvisi Consulting has devised its own QB valuation system. If ESPN can create something called the "Total QBR" system, then, effective 2013, we've empowered the pocket protectors in R&D to come strong with their own grading system while adhering to our steadfast rule -- no math.

Follow me here: once upon a time, I wandered up to a diamond counter and learned about the 4 C's. What if we applied those 4 C's to QB's? After all, quarterbacks should be considered the jewels of football, right?

Still with me? Because, truth be told, this is all inspired by recent events, where I had a chance to sit down with Carson Palmer for an extended interview. Did I get to know the Cards new starting QB? Sure. But (like most everything else in life), what do I really know at this point?

Good question. In search of an answer, it's time to employ our "4 C's QB Rating" technique. Instead of carat, cut, color, clarity… we're going with:

• Capability: In addition to his 2012 stats with the Raiders (4K+ passing yards, 22 TD, 14 INT, 61% completion rate), GM Steve Keim says he looked at every pass Palmer has thrown the past three seasons and, based on the film, sees no evidence of deteriorating performance.

• Competitive: If the golf course is any indication, including the Cardinals Charity Golf Tourney where Palmer was none too happy about narrowly losing to a certain Cardinals kicker (1st place finisher Jay Feely), then Palmer still rates as hyper-competitive.

• Cerebral: Playing NFL QB is a thinking man's game. And the first word that a certain future Hall of Fame receiver used to describe his new QB was "cerebral." Enough said.

• Command: Entering his 11th season and with Pro Bowls on his resume, Palmer commands respect in the huddle. And, based on the progress that Palmer reports to date in learning the playbook, he appears to have a real command of the new Bruce Arians offense. Palmer: "I think our scheme fits my style of play very well."

And here's the beauty of applying our 4 C's system on quarterbacks: either you got it or you don't. Think of it as pass/fail for signal callers. No GPAs. No decimal points.

Either you get a "passing" grade, or you don't.

"I'm 48 years old. I'm too old for this. My family deserves better," Grace said from a picnic table within the razor wire at Tent City.

As a high-profile former major leaguer with the ability to instantly generate media coverage, Grace has decided to appoint a poster boy/spokesperson to drive awareness on drunk driving. Namely, himself.

"I made a rotten decision and ended up here," Grace explained. "I'm not an evil person."

Grace told the media he hasn't had a drink since his August arrest. And ever since sobering up, he's been delivering a sobering message.

"What you think is intoxicated and what the state of Arizona thinks is intoxicated are two different things," said Grace.

Two would also be the number of DUI convictions Grace endured over a 15-month span.

"Shoot, if you do what I did, not only once, but you're dumb enough to do it twice like I did, you belong here."

"If I do it again, I'm going to be in the Arizona Department of Corrections for over a year," Grace continued during a Wednesday night press conference. "Like I said, my kids deserve better than that. My family deserves better than that."

Back in high school, I had an old ball coach (no, not Steve Spurrier) who was fond of free advice to his motley collection of wanna-be-Ronnie Lotts: "Look, life really ain't that hard. Do the most with what you have. That's all you can do. And you owe it to everyone who doesn't have as much as you."

Right now, Gracie doesn't have much more than a bunk bed under an open air tent after his day job as a D-backs minor league coach, but I do admire the manner in which he's finding a way to create awareness.

If people live vicariously through pro athletes, then Grace is turning the tables and forcing people to look in his mirror and (maybe, just maybe) see themselves -- before it's too late.

"If I'm that stinking stupid to do that again, I want you to come punch me right in the mouth," Grace said emphatically.

No thanks. We'll take Grace's message as a verbal jab and consider it a message sent.

In fact, this weekend, we have plans to attend an annual fund raiser dinner, replete with complimentary bar. Sure, I'd like to go Paulie Pale Ale. But it's not worth it, not if I'm planning to drive.

Instead, that beer can wait until I get home for the night. Something Mark Grace can't do until his release on June 10th.

The Organization - the only thing approaching Upton's talent level (hence, our nickname: J-Upside), were the expectations. Naturally, the D-backs' mega-marketing campaign only fueled the anticipation. In fact, following the blockbuster trade to the Braves, the team has since admitted that the weight of those expectations capsized Good Ship Uptown. Too much, too soon with a velocity that was too intense. Especially without the presence of a veteran mentor as a next door neighbor in the clubhouse, which, alas, would've been invaluable (a Luis Gonzalez or Tony Clark-type player).

The Front Office - did the team create a self-fulfilling prophecy? With so many trade rumors becoming so public and so incessant, it became necessary to deal Upton. Simply put, the climate surrounding Upton eventually mandated that a change of scenery was necessary - for all parties. Turns out, that almost certainly undermined the value Upton commanded in return.

The Player - in the span of a single year, Upton went from receiving an All-Star standing ovation in his home ballpark to a constant chorus of boos after strikeouts. Did the injured thumb evolve from not just hampering his swing, but eventually bruising his standing with D-backs faithful as his poor play invited more scrutiny? In the clubhouse, multiple sources share that Upton wasn't a clubhouse cancer, but he wasn't exactly an asset to the atmosphere, either.

The Fans - all we know for certain is that the upshot of this Upton ordeal is that fans are deprived of watching the Goldschmidt-Upton duo hit in the heart of the D-backs' lineup for the next half-dozen years. And that's where the triple play becomes a grand slam and we're all out.

"I'm coming back out and they're going to see how much I've advanced."

That's what Dansby said during a conference call with AZ reporters in the week leading up to the Cards game against the Dolphins last season. At the time, it was a game matching up Dansby's current team against his former team.

Effective Friday, the Cardinals are Dansby's current team -- again.

And again, he'll be counted on to be a playmaker at inside linebacker, especially in the absence of Daryl Washington. By the way, that begets another former/current scenario. This time, we're talking about the last two guys to wear #58 -- Dansby and D-Wash.

"He's a dynamic player, what more can I say about him?" Dansby said last September, before going on to do just that about Washington. "He's a young guy, very athletic, very fast. He reminds me of myself, man, making a lot of plays, he helps the defense get set."

In fact, whether it's Dansby replacing Washington at LB (each had 134 tackles last season) or Dansby replacing some of the leadership lost with the absence of Adrian Wilson and Paris Lenon, Karlos had another telling comment last fall about Washington that he hopes rings true about himself when he said: "…they did a great job of getting a guy to fill those voids."

They just might call that coming full-circle.

An odd sight, to be sure. Almost jarring. But, considering (another) terrifying comebacker on Tuesday night, a helmet replacing a pitcher's cap does something else -- it makes complete sense.

"I came in and watched (video of) it and I wish I wouldn't have," former D-backs pitcher Joe Saunders told the AP. "It was ugly. It was scary. I just hope he's going to be alright."

Blue Jays' pitcher J.A. Happ took a wicked line drive off his head that ricocheted into the outfield. Happ was wheeled off on a stretcher into an ambulance and rushed to a nearby hospital. He was released Wednesday morning.

Truth be told, I'm basing the above account on eyewitness reports, because I'm taking Saunders' advice on the replay -- just say "no."

Which is exactly what Major League Baseball has been doing on this topic of protecting the pitcher. Well, guess what, three strikes (to the skull) and ‘yer out. Enough. It's time for baseball to stop convening and start implementing.

Base coaches now wear protective headgear. Do we remember what it took to make that happen? Tragically, during a minor league game, first base coach Mike Coolbaugh was struck by a line drive, only to be pronounced dead about an hour later. That was July 2007. Come November 2007, MLB general managers mandated that base coaches must wear batting helmets.

"We are actively meeting with a number of companies that are attempting to develop a product, and have reviewed test results for several products," MLB spokesman Pat Courtney told the AP in an email after Happ was injured. "Some of the products are promising. No company has yet developed a product that has satisfied the testing criteria."

Would the players' union need to approve any sort of rule change to make big league pitchers wear helmets? Yes. Is there resistance? Yes el grande.

"You know the risks," Angels lefty C.J. Wilson said. "Guys get hurt crashing into fences. Guys get hurt tripping over first base and blowing their knee out. This is professional sports, and we are paid well to take those risks."

On the other side of the pitching rubber, Rockies lefty Jorge De La Rosa said if a helmet or liner is developed for pitchers, he'd gladly wear one.

"It wouldn't be hard for me," De La Rosa said. "To protect against those kinds of things, it's good for us."

Of course, here in AZ, we're well aware of how Brandon McCarthy absorbed a direct hit to the head by a line drive last September, causing a skull fracture, an epidural hemorrhage and a brain contusion that required surgery. The D-backs pitcher started against the Dodgers on Tuesday night. Afterward, McCarthy told reporters he won't watch video of Happ getting hit either.

"I don't know what the GMs and the owners have to do with anything. It's not like they're pitching," McCarthy said. "Until someone makes something that works, it's going to be tough for someone to wear it.

"You'd have to have something that protected the ear and then the face and beyond. So it's kind of a slippery slope. Someone will have to come up with something really good and really sound. Otherwise, I don't know how you answer that question."

We do. Big leaguers need to emulate Little Leaguers. Going to the mound should become just like heading to the batter's box -- grab a helmet.

"We've put things on the moon before, so I feel like we can create some sort of a device that sits over your head and protects you," McCarthy said as he expressed hope. "Someone will do it. It's just a matter of when, not if."

"We've got to do things in this offseason that begin to build trust and confidence that we're headed in the right direction."

Was that Suns president of basketball operations Lon Babby? Yes. Does he recognize that a skeptical Suns fan base needs to see progress or at least tangible evidence of a plan that promises improvement? Yes x 2.

Can the Suns gain that trust and confidence by hiring the GM candidate who finished behind Lance Blanks three years ago?

Uh, no. #Buzzer. Putting our finger to the wind of change, we'll forecast that there is no way orange-clad fans would buy into hiring a candidate who wasn't considered dynamic or impressive enough by the same Suns administration to beat out Lance "Flatline" Blanks.

That's not to say that Milwaukee Bucks assistant general manager Jeff Weltman isn't a worthy member of an NBA front office (Note: I'd much rather have the player the Bucks drafted from North Carolina 14th overall - 6'11" John Henson - than the Tar Heel the Suns selected 13th overall - Kendall Marshall. #HolyCannoliStat: Henson averaged 15 pts & 15 rebs over the final five games when Larry Sanders was injured.)

But, let's remember, the Suns state they're looking for a "first-rate talent evaluator."

So, are we to believe that a genuine first-rate talent evaluator has been sitting in Milwaukee the past three years? His valuable acumen to assess talent simply undiscovered? Nobody else has realized his skill set?

Hence, it's time to revisit the most pertinent question of all. As we've previously stated here at Calvisi Consulting on-air: it's not whether the Suns should hire a "first-rate talent evaluator." Indeed, we all nod accordingly.

The real question at hand is whether the Suns have the ability to hire that guy.

Can they identify the person who can identify NBA talent? #TickTock

Instead, here's the lament: there simply isn't enough baseball in baseball. Not anymore.

Stepping out of the batter's box -- after every pitch in every at-bat -- is not baseball.

Going through the rigmarole of readjusting your batting gloves -- after every pitch in every at-bat -- is not baseball.

Colorado Rockies starter Jeff Francis -- who redefines and personifies the words "methodical" and "deliberate" -- is not baseball. His pitching pace mimics his fastball -- slow enough to make you check your DVR to confirm the kids didn't hit the slow-motion mode.

Alas, if only there was more baseball in baseball. Well, guess what? That time has come in the Atlantic League, where they have put the game up on jack stands and they've been turning wrenches.

Time for a tune-up. Or, in this case, a speed-up. All courtesy of a minor baseball league.

"Duration and pace of games have become out of touch with our fan base who need to go to work and go to school in the morning," Atlantic League executive director Joe Klein said in a statement. "We hope to come out of this season with faster games and some ideas that could be considered."

Klein, a former general manager for three big league clubs, also said umpires will be instructed to call the strike zone as it exists in the rule book.

To me, that's a wild pitch. Calvisi Consulting isn't looking to alter the strike zone. Truth be told, I'm not interested in seeing pitches just below the armpits called strikes. #Buzzer.

Instead, I'll simply settle for playing the game itself, instead of playing the waiting game. Because, at this rate, forget about cup holders; every seat in every MLB stadium should come with a magazine rack, like the waiting room at the doctor's office.

"We are not trying to change the game," Klein said, "only to help to keep it in tune with the times."

Again -- it's not the game itself. And it's not that I don't have three hours. When it comes to football, we're all willing to invest the time necessary. Not a problem. Until those three hours feel like an eight-hour work day.

We've all heard of "dog years." If baseball doesn't do something soon, the younger generation will coin the term "dog hours," on behalf of baseball.

Where's the baseball in baseball? It's almost like we need to see a list of ingredients to determine what's pure and what's filler.

Thing is, it's the same way with any sort of entertainment option, like the cinema. At the movies, it's not the length, it's the pace. An epic and gripping three-hour flick can feel like 90 minutes. Conversely, buy a ticket for Mall Cop IV and the first half-hour feels like an all-day assignment in traffic court.

More baseball in baseball. #Ding.

Even better is when you consider that the minor leagues have historically innovated, this new/old/improved brand of baseball might be coming soon to a stadium near you. Can't wait.

Okay, here we go with our 7-Day Forecast…err, #7-Pick overall.

See, during the radio show, when I asked GM Steve Keim if this year's draft class is indeed as deep in offensive linemen as advertised? Keim replied that the Cards scouting staff had just finished discussing that exact position group earlier that same day.

"It is a good group," Keim nodded. "From top to bottom. There are guys who are going to go in the first round that I think are going to have tremendous success. I think there are going to be guys you can find in rounds three through six who are going to be good quality NFL starters."

Ding! Here in the war room weather center, it's that comment about offensive line depth that just resulted in red and yellow imagery all over our storm tracker map.

Hence, here's our Paulie Projection guaranteed forecast, replete with multiple IFs:

If the big three OTs are indeed all off the board by the seventh pick, and if Keim is indeed genuine in his expressed on-air belief that the 2013 draft is mega-deep in offensive linemen (a position Keim knows well as a former All-ACC guard) and if a big-time pass rusher is still on the board?

If that all comes together, then our Thursday night forecast affixes a smiling yellow sun graphic right next to -- Dion Jordan, the outside linebacker from Oregon.

But, ya know what? Bring an umbrella, just in case.

And let's just say there's a reason that Peter King had his name on the Cardinals Pre-Pat's Run charity event recently.

As a longtime NFL insider for Sports Illustrated, Peter King writes. And people read. He churns out multi-media content and NFL fans consume on various platforms.

But last Friday, I had a few minutes to pose a few questions -- in person. After King eloquently responded to questions about Tillman and King's longtime former hometown of Boston, we audibled into the Arizona Cardinals.

For example, I asked King to bottom line Cards new head coach Bruce Arians.

"Players will play for this guy," King said slowly and emphatically. "X's and O's are very important. But there's also the motivation of men. Bruce Arians is going to motivate these guys."

Speaking of team leaders, I put the following question to King: "If quarterback, head coach, and general manager are the lifeblood of any NFL organization, then how do you think the Cardinals will fare with Palmer, Arians, and Keim in the years to come?"

"That's a great question. In my opinion, if there was one quarterback out there this off-season, including the rookies, who this team could've acquired, I think it would've been Carson Palmer. Because Arians wants a QB who can throw the ball downfield. He wants a QB who's a veteran, who's been there before. And Carson Palmer really fits that," King said.

And when it comes to Palmer, King made sure to mention that acquiring Palmer via trade is not just a matter of answering "who" is playing QB, but "how"...as in, "how much?"

"Let's be honest, they paid nothing for Carson Palmer. And that's a little baptism by fire for Steve Keim. That's really his first big decision, when you think about it.

"(Keim) won that one. He routed the Raiders on that one," King continued. "Of course, the Raiders didn't have a lot of choice because everybody knew they had to cut him, but Keim made a really good trade."

What sort of fit will Palmer prove to be? And what's the upside? That was the final topic.

"Carson Palmer, I think, has been bruised and battered by his experience in Oakland," said King. "Carson Palmer has always wanted to throw the ball downfield. He's always wanted a weapon like Larry Fitzgerald."

That was the response from Larry Fitzgerald when I texted him with an inquiry -- any chance he might be available for an edition of our offseason tradition "Five with Fitz" via text message?

So, here we go, from cell phone to cell phone to this printed piece of cyberspace…

Question 1 - "Do u have a favorite Draft day memory or funny story from 2004 when u were the #3 pick overall?"

Larry Fitzgerald: "I was asked to come to New York. They wanted me to come out bad but I had lost my mother a few months prior to it, so I wanted to be close to my family and friends. So we rented out a room at the downtown Chicago Hilton and celebrated together. It was the best. All of my grandparents and I will always remember that experience."

Question 2 - "What are your early takeaways from working with Carson Palmer so far?"

Larry Fitzgerald: "A cerebral guy who really wants to play at a high level and win. It's fun working with a quarterback of his pedigree. I'm excited as are my teammates about the opportunity we have with him and also Coach B.A."

Question 3 - "How much respect do u have for MMA guys? If u could be a 2-sport athlete, would u start training with Benson Henderson?!"

Larry Fitzgerald: "I love MMA. It's one of my favorite sports. Such tough hard working guys. You have to be so mentally and physically tough to compete. Benson is a special human being who happens to be a champion. I would love to train with those guys, but I have no desire at all to be in the octagon."

Question 4: "For newcomers to #FitzSoftball…whatz it all about?"

Larry Fitzgerald: "It's a family event that raises proceeds for worthy causes to support people in need. There will be fan engagement and plenty of autograph opportunities." Click here for information.

Question 5: "Can u give us a highlight that still resonates from your offseason travels?"

Larry Fitzgerald: "Standing on an iceberg in Antarctica."

As in, don't send the team owner to press fans on changing out of Dodger Blue. That's when the Sedona Red alarm should sound.

Look, if you don't like the look of fans rocking Dodger gear in seats closer to home plate than the pitcher's mound, it's one thing to mull it over. It's another thing to perhaps even mutter it. Either way, you'll probably get away with it.

But as soon as the owner gets out of his seat and is spotted with flapping arms and flapping gums, well, you are it. The bigwig becomes the big story.

And, hey, we all get it -- seeing opposing colors make team officials see red. But are the D-backs alone in trying to drown out their sorrows? Uh, no. Here in the A-Z, those bar stools are occupied with patrons from every local team.

Think about it, when the Coyotes host the Red Wings, what do we get? How ‘bout every winged-wheel sweater this side of Gordie Howe.

When the Lakers are in town, what populates the stands? Kobe Bryant jerseys ad-nauseum. When ASU hosts UA at Wells Fargo Arena, heck, it's like somebody stole the curbs off the streets as Tempe temporarily morphs into Tucson North.

And when the Cardinals play the Cowboys, Bears, Giants, Packers, etc… what do you see (and hear) from the tailgate area through the front gate? Yes -- a melting pot of NFL jerseys in all their visiting team glory.

Frustrating? Maddening? Ding and ding. But we are the Valley of the Transplant. Non-native Arizonans leave their family, friends and hometowns yet refuse to leave behind their team allegiances.

We all know this, just like we know the following: if you win, they're in. Literally. Into your team shop to get into your gear.

Hence, why so sensitive? Attention D-backs -- don't go all Carlos Quentin here. Take the Dodger bean ball in the back and take your base.

No need to charge the mound. Or, in this case, change the clothes. It can always get worse. And you know what's worse than looking at Dodger Blue in box seats? Looking small.

So, with special thanks to Herm Edwards, let's all remember: the "D" in D-back should stand for - "Don't Press Send."

In fact, the creative department at Calvisi Consulting envisions Eldrick starring in a sort of post-Super Bowl Disneyland commercial. Except, this would be the antonym version. The exact opposite of the ad that annually features the Super Bowl MVP.

[Announcer]: "Tiger Woods - you just lost the Masters! Again. You're NOT going to Butler's Cabin. What do you have to say about your game?"

Then Tiger would simply repeat verbatim what he told the media after a ninth straight year without another green jacket.

"I certainly had a chance. If I would've posted a number today, I was right there," Tiger said. "I was four back starting out the day. I thought I really played well this week. Made my share of putts this week as well."

Once upon a time, Tiger Woods would lose a tourney and proceed to lose his cool. He was demanding, especially in majors, of himself. He would curse and gripe and grouse, sending TV networks scrambling for the bleep button.

Not anymore. Not even close. Alas, he now gives himself a pep talk worthy of tee ball, where everyone gets the same trophy.

"You lose more tournaments than we win out here on tour," Tiger reasoned. "So, it's just part of the process. I'll get back to it."

No, you won't. Not gonna happen. The losing will continue until you lose the diplomatic demeanor, especially under the intense pressure of a major. When you get back to being the erstwhile Tiger and find that previous mentality (read: ruthless assassin), you'll get back to winning.

With all due apologies to Billy Payne, we're going to mix Augusta National Golf Club with a line from Talladega Nights: "If you ain't first, you're last." That's the motto that Tigers need to adopt - again.

Since Tiger hired and fired virtually every notable swing instructor in the game, I think it's now our turn. Paulie 3-Putt says if Eldrick wants to swing like the Tiger 1.0 version, then he needs to sound like it.

Otherwise, we're getting ready to blame this majors drought (five years and counting) on Tiger's caddy, or lack thereof.

How else do you explain the following Holy Cannoli Stat: Steve Williams was on the bag for 13 of Tiger Woods' 14 major titles.

Hmmm. Any chance that Williams might actually demand more of his players (Adam Scott) than Tiger currently demands of himself?

"I played well,'' Tiger said. ``Unfortunately, I just didn't make enough putts."

Sigh.

Thursday night, during the Big Red Rage radio show on Arizona Sports 620, it was my turn to listen.

And, no doubt, we had some solid inside stories spun by both Arizona Cardinals GM Steve Keim and receiver Michael Floyd.

In fact, Floyd shared a meeting he had with Bruce Arians just a few hours before show time.

"Coach Arians comes up to me and he told me to come up to his office and he asked me just basically the question - ‘how great do I wanna be.'" Floyd reiterated.

Ron Wolfley followed by asking the 13th pick overall in the 2012 NFL Draft the same question -- "how great DO you want to be?"

"I think everyone's dream, well, mine personally, is to be a Hall of Fame wide receiver. And I'll do anything for that," Floyd said to applause from the crowd at Majerle's Sports Grill.

With a full season now under his belt, I asked Floyd to name the best cornerback he faced all season.

"I would say Antonio Cromartie from the Jets. Both Seattle corners are pretty good," Floyd answered. Then, Wolf asked him a rhetorical question of sorts, "Sherman does a lot of talking out there, doesn't he?" Floyd nodded immediately and added, "A lot of talking, yeah."

Of course, Floyd will be a main target of new quarterback Carson Palmer. What sort of first impression did the veteran QB make with GM Steve Keim?

"We took him to dinner," Keim shared about Palmer's visit to Arizona before the trade. "After that, we were going to try and get him over to the facilities. Well, he calls me at 6:15 in the morning and he's begging me to come pick him up at the hotel so he can go watch tape. I mean, for a 33-year-old quarterback who's played nine years in the league, I love that passion."

As for potential draft picks who might be protecting Palmer along the Cards offensive line, I asked Keim if the upcoming draft is indeed as loaded with offensive line prospects as we've been hearing.

"We finished talking about most of the offensive lineman today and it is a good group," Keim said. "Not only from top to bottom, there are guys who are going to go in the first round that I think are going to have tremendous success. And I think there are going to be guys you can find in round three through six who are going to be good quality NFL starters."

Speaking of offensive lineman, as we wrapped up our interview with Keim, I asked the Cards GM for a "Breakout Player" nominee here in 2013? Ssshhh. But after a few moments of deliberation, Keim says to keep an eye on right tackle Bobby Massie.

First, that McDonald's TV commercial. We've all seen and heard it. Fishy, Fishy.

Second, I can't rid my mind of how the Suns game ended in Houston. Fishy, Fishy.

With the score tied and a game winning shot attempt in the air with no time on the clock, Jermaine O'Neal committed an egregious goaltend. Game over.

Congratulations -- the Phoenix Suns just invented a new way to lose. In some ways, it was truly ingenious and innovative, to be sure. But it was something else as well -- very beneficial.

Let's not forget, the Suns are currently engaged in a very tight race. No, it's certainly not the playoff race. #JimMora #Playoffs?!

In hindsight, the Suns were mathematically eliminated from the postseason the very moment they signed Michael Beasley. (Cue Coach Singletary - "I want winners!")

At the moment, the Suns are 1 ½ games worse than the Cavaliers, which means they're 1 ½ games ahead of Cleveland for what both teams lust after -- that third slot behind Charlotte and Orlando for worst record in the NBA.

(By the way, kudos to the Cavs, who blew a 20 point lead in the 4th quarter to win.. err, lose to the Pacers. Fishy, Fishy.)

Hence, Paulie Ping Pong Ball simply ain't buying that a 17-year veteran somehow commits an innocent game-losing goaltend at the buzzer. Sorry, considering the circumstances, it's really not plausible. Not when he touched the ball and the rim. You know, for good measure, just in case the officials missed one or the other. Fishy, Fishy.

Although the Suns sort of mustered up an argument and feigned insolence, the video review was an absolute slam dunk. Game over. (Cue Al McCoy: "Suns Lose! Err, wait…Suns Win!")

After the game, O'Neal went thru the motions of protesting the ruling (wink, wink).

"It was off the rim, for sure,'' O'Neal said. ``He (ref) is saying it was still in the cylinder when I did it. The problem is that they called a goaltend and counted the basket before they did the review. So there's not enough evidence to change the call."

Here's what the reporters should've written down on their notepads: "Fishy, Fishy."

Let's just say that the referee had a different assessment, with video replay serving as indisputable evidence.

"Jermaine O'Neal touched it while it was in the cylinder,'' David Jones told a pool reporter. "The ball was on the rim and in the cylinder."

Look, if NBA teams didn't tank games in the past, we wouldn't even have the current lottery system. Tanking games is not akin to a Big Foot sighting. It exists beyond doctored photos.

Furthermore, when the Suns strategically benched Goran Dragic for two straight games recently, let's just say their motivation came into question. Fishy, Fishy.

So, as non-playoff teams play out the string and jockey for position, let's all remember that the best indicator of the future is the past. Ten straight losses for the Suns. Fifteen of their last 17. We know the Suns are planning to lose, we're just not sure how. Fishy, Fishy.

Shorts that look like zubaz (circa 1991). Jerseys with sleeves, akin to pajama tops. Circus shorts in need of "The Big Top."

College hoops has put the "mad" into March Madness alright. Uniform designers have gone mad and we're hopping mad. And, yes, the collective "we" goes way beyond Paulie Pastel.

In fact, all the way to the top. In going thru his bracket with ESPN prior to the tourney, President Barack Obama cited the uniforms as a reason Notre Dame wouldn't advance past the first weekend, saying "that neon glow wasn't working for me."

We'd love to say that college basketball looks great. But, we can be honest, right? Forgetting the blocking/charging debate for a moment, when it comes to the recent look of college hoops and Adidas reinventing the uniforms, basketball is trying way too hard. And it's hard to watch -- literally.

Here's what basketball is not -- it's not football. It can't pull off a multitude of multiple patterns and multi-layered color schemes -- it's like multiple personalities.

Who am I watching again? And who did this school used to be? Which personality are they today? Louisville? Are you sure? Can I see some identification?

Watching these Adidas teams reminds me of the guy far beyond the 18-34 age demo who's spotted wearing skate gear T-shirts and flat-bill caps (What? How dare you stare straight at Paulie Mid-Life Crisis!?)

Just like "That Guy," it's time for basketball to look itself in the mirror. That is, if it can stand the sight.

Based on recent fashion trends, I know that I can't. For instance, I grew up watching the Golden State Warriors. Recently, when they busted out their "Ode to the Banana Peel" uniform combo with Tour de France leader jersey tops, I threw up watching the Warriors.

We've all heard the saying -- if it's too loud, you're too old. Well, the new uniforms are most definitely loud, no doubt. But it's not the volume, it's the message. It screams that college basketball is desperate. When uniforms inspire comparisons to Underoos with Fruit Stripes, then it's painfully obvious that the sport is eager to sacrifice tradition in hopes of becoming part of an imagined in-crowd. Or worse, to create an additional revenue stream.

In an interview with AP, Jeff Halmos, part of the menswear designer duo Shipley & Halmos, termed the uniforms "ultra-forward." Yet, don't call it a compliment.

"I was so shocked at UCLA. If I was part of a storied franchise like that, I'd say, 'Absolutely not.' I would tell my team that it's an honor to wear this traditional jersey, and I wouldn't cheapen it," he said. "There's a threshold to which innovation crosses a boundary. The 'throwback era' -- when classic uniforms had a mainstream moment a few years ago -- that was so much better. To me, there's so much in menswear that's about heritage."

For years, we've been calling it the "Uniformication" of college sports. Essentially, it comes down to whether your school has a rich history that fans would miss.

Boise State rebranding -- good. I mean, what sort of heritage does Spud State really evoke, right? Feel free to experiment with new uniforms every single game for all anyone cares.

But a Michigan-Ohio State game where you can't recognize either team -- not good.

And now, we see that college hoops has something up its sleeve alright. Both of ‘em.

If we're talking zip code, then we don't have a clue. But if we're talking whether the Coyotes are going to the postseason? How can you not say -- "no way." Right?

And that's not us talking. That's what the recent roster moves say to everyone, including the Coyotes dressing room.

Two points away from a playoff spot with a dozen games to play and the front office trades it away? How can that not be our takeaway when it comes to the trio of trades made before the deadline on Wednesday?

Gone are veterans Raffi Torres, Steve Sullivan and Matthew Lombardi. Coming back in return to help fuel a season ending run would be...uh, wait, hang on, gimme a moment. Oh, here we go: a minor league player and future draft picks. #AlrightyThen

What happened to the immediate future? And, for once, we're not talking about the Coyotes existence or staying power in Arizona (although that's coming in a moment).

Instead, we're talking about the playoff push. Well, truth be told, we would have until the team brass decided to push the eject button.

"This is not surrendering the white flag," Coyotes assistant general manager Brad Treliving said in the absence of GM Don Maloney, who was unavailable due to a death in the family. "This is doing what we have to do from a management level to maximize the assets we need to maximize and give opportunities to people we think deserve opportunities."

Look, it's not like somebody needs to take our car keys. We're perfectly sober. Ask us if the postseason should be considered a long shot? Yes, most likely. Especially since the Coyotes are missing the key cog from last year's squad that made the miraculous run to the Western Conference Finals -- goalie Mike Smith (injury).

But, hang on. That's the Coyotes DNA. Virtually everything is a long shot when it comes to the outfit that still lives by its 2012 marketing mantra "Hockey the Hard Way."

And considering everything that Coyotes fans have endured, don't the suits in the Coyotes front office owe fans a similar devotion? Heck, the front half of the season already got buzz-sawed by the NHL lockout. After yesterday, it now appears that the back end of the season will be trimmed by the lack of a complete commitment.

Actually, you know what? Forget the fans for a moment. What about the Coyotes players? And we're not talking about the three players who just got traded. Fact is, all three veterans (Torres, Lombardi, Sullivan) are set to become unrestricted free agents after the season. So, if you want to list 'em on eBay, go right ahead.

"Where we are at now, with our ability to sign these players going forward and into next year, we felt it was prudent to see what kind of assets we could recoup," Treliving said.

Gotcha. But if you're going to hit the subtract button on the calculator, then you have to follow up by punching the button with the plus sign on it. You must add something or, in this case, someone to the mix. Otherwise, what message, or lack thereof, do you send to your own locker room? ("Yeah, uh, boys, the standings may say we're close to the playoffs…but, yeah, we didn't really believe this squad was capable...so instead of putting on the foil, just take it off.")

And, yes, we realize the Coyotes are handcuffed by the ownership dynamic (read: 29 other owners crowding the Coyotes kitchen).

Comprendo. But, with the clock (almost assuredly) ticking on the NHL in the A-Z, it still would've been nice to see the Coyotes leave behind a different final impression.

Remember -- a WhiteOut always beats a white flag.

Yet, after Kevin Kolb went down with injury, what did the Arizona Cardinals have last year? They had multiple quarterbacks who lost multiple games. Single-handedly.

As evidence, may we present the following stats? Kevin Kolb - 8 TD, 3 INT. Skelton/Lindley/Hoyer - 3 TD, 17 INT. Game over.

As a refresher, touchdowns tend to win games while turnovers typically lose games. That is, with the exception of the Atlanta game last season, where the Cards defense forced a half-dozen turnovers and the Cards still lost. Why? Everybody now -- they had QBs who lost games.

So, what do the Cards need again this year? (Hint -- it doesn't include the word "liability").

Unlike a signal caller who loses games all by his lonesome, the Cards really do not require the flip side -- a player who will win the game all by himself. Now, would they welcome that? Uh, yes. A thousand times yes. But, barring a miraculous Russell Wilson discovery in the middle of the draft, a veteran/winning QB will have to suffice as the search continues.

Translation -- a quarterback with a track record of success. Currently, the Cards have a collection of QBs with…potential. Yeah, that's an apt description.

What the Cards don't have is a proven player at the position. A proven performer who will turn the unknown into a known. A competent QB who eliminates the guessing game from game to game by the coaching staff and front office.

What's more, the Cards need a QB who will generate buy-in from the rest of the roster.

At his breakfast meeting with the media a couple weeks ago, Bruce Arians told the story of how a veteran defender saw a single pass from Andrew Luck during a Colts practice and exclaimed -- "hey, we're back!"

Ding. That's what the Cards need -- a belief. A confidence they can compete. A quarterback that will help the team help itself, instead of inducing defeat before they break the huddle.

This season, that looks to be Carson Palmer.

We're not exactly sure what the pregame whiteboard listed as the "Keys" Wednesday night, but, essentially, all that really needed to be written: "Goran Dragic: DNP-CD = L."

Did not play - coach's decision. Equals loss. That was the pep talk guaranteed to deliver.

Although, if we were sitting courtside and keeping the box score, the more accurate acronym would've read: DNT-TW: Did Not Try - To Win.

Indeed, an NBA franchise that has railed against its roster for mailing in games just licked a first-class stamp in Utah.

Let's get this straight -- the team expects the locker room to go all out, yet the front office just bailed out?

By not playing their best player, who was coming off the best overall game of his career (31 pts, 12 assists, 9 rebs), the Suns did not give their best effort, to be kind.

And this is how a franchise goes about establishing a culture where everyone leaves everything on the court?

Was Dragic dealing with injury? No. Playing his fourth game in five nights? Not even close. Turns out, the schedule graced the Suns with a couple of off-days prior to squaring off against the Jazz.

Now, were the Suns trying to win ping-pong balls? Shazam! It doesn't take Paulie Percentages to realize that now we're getting somewhere.

When the Jazz win, the Suns win. So, facing Utah Wednesday night, the Suns set out to lose. Which, in turn, they hope will result in a win-win on draft day -- a pair of lottery picks.

See, if the Lakers miss the playoffs, the Suns gain the Lakers' first round pick (not lottery protected) from the Steve Nash trade.

Thing is, it doesn't take Herm Edwards to realize that if a team doesn't play to win the game, then why would fans even begin to care about the game? Why should the media cover the game? (Hey, any chance that money-back guarantee policy still exists?)

At the very least, Wednesday night certainly wasn't worthy of the regular season. More fitting would be if someone petitioned the league office to record the loss in the preseason standings.

Hit zoom out for a moment -- are the Suns currently weighing the future of the franchise? No doubt. Right now, the Suns front office has decided that winning games is not nearly as important as winning ping-pong balls.

Two problems here: first, isn't the very existence of the lottery system designed to prevent the intentional tanking of regular season games? Meaning, when someone does place that call to NBA headquarters, please ask for David Stern.

Second, what sort of message does playing to lose ultimately send? More importantly, what sort of team culture does that allow to flourish?

Earlier this week on Arizona Sports 620, Doug & Wolf asked Jared Dudley whether the Suns need a change in culture?

"Focus might be an issue, you hear the word ‘effort' used a lot. And they're basically saying ‘hey, it won't be tolerated, we're going to play through it consistently,'" Dudley said. "Any NBA team you should play for, you should always play hard, you should always play together, you should always play smart."

Do what I say, not what I do. In parenting, there is a concept called modeling. Children see what their parents do and model their behavior after it.

The Phoenix Suns might be drilling into their players that a lack of effort "won't be tolerated," but their lineups say otherwise.

Of course not. Not even in the aftermath of a crash, a fight and a broken back. Why not?

That's easy. Over the past few years, NASCAR ratings have been lagging and sagging. Television, ticket sales and corporate sponsorships have all waned. The sport has been in need of an overall turbo boost of popularity.

Hence, a couple years ago, the NASCAR suits (business suits, not race suits) announced a new policy fashioned around the longtime saying - "Boys, have at it." In other words, if the road rage carries over to the garage area (Ex: PIR 2012 - Clint Bowyer vs Jeff Gordon) or payback is exacted in punching each other instead of the throttle, well, boys will be boys.

As longtime Valley resident and two-time Indianapolis 500 winner Arie Luyendyk tweeted afterwards: "Drama always attracts fans and viewers." Then, he added that "@dennyhamlin is lucky to survive that crash and @joeylogano is lucky to survive @tonystewart."

Arie is talking about the FFFF on Sunday - Fantastic Fontana Fireworks Finish. After the checkered flag flew, so did the fisticuffs. Simply put, Stewart was more revved up than his race car. He left his four wheels behind for his own two legs and made a straight line for Logano. As expected, crew members separated the two drivers. After a straight right hand, Stewart brought the straight talk regarding the 22-year-old Logano. "He's sent Denny to the hospital and screwed our day up," Stewart said. "He's talked the talk, but he hasn't walked the walk yet. He's always got his crew guys walking the walk for him. He wants to talk about it? We'll talk about it.

"If NASCAR wants to let the guys have at it, it shouldn't be any different than hockey—let us have it and when one guy goes to the ground, it's over," Stewart said.

Hit the brakes right there! Maybe that's the ticket that will sell tickets. Tweak the mantra that states "have at it, boys" to read "stand back and actually allow the boys to be boys, I'll be gol-danged."

"After he threw the water bottle at me like a little girl, we'll go at it now. I'm not going to listen," Stewart said. "I don't care what he has to say. It's just words right now. Actions speak louder than words."

And so do TV ratings. NASCAR's overnight TV ratings one week after Logano feuded with Denny Hamlin were up 32 percent, according to Fox.

Stewart was mighty angry. Thing is, the veteran NASCAR driver might've also been a visionary.

What's that old business saying - see a need, fill a need. Well, with the NFL and NHL rapidly decreasing the violence and physicality in their respective sports, perhaps NASCAR needs to ramp it up?

Fans don't connect with metal. They don't bond with the vehicle itself. They share emotionally with other human beings -- drivers.

At PIR last fall, I was covering NASCAR. All of a sudden, the grandstands roared upon the sight of Bowyer chasing after Gordon on the big screens, with the media then chasing after Bowyer (I'm still winded).

As Brad Keselowski told the media this past week, a fight is the type of "water cooler conversation" fans relish.

"Whether it is joy or anger, that is what the fans crave," he said. "They want to see us be human, and humans are emotional."

Hmmm. Maybe Stewart has hit on something by essentially scribbling "hockey fight" on a slip of paper and stuffing it into the suggestion box.

Meaning, speaking of boxes, maybe the time has come for NASCAR to install a penalty box.