Sports Kabob – 5/20

Ladies and gentlemen (and especially ladies), welcome to the Sports Kabob, a skewered look at the world of sports and pop culture.

Here are the top stories:

Before a crowd that cheered her lustily both before and after the race, Rachel Alexandra became the first filly to win the Preakness since 1924 and became the first horse to win both the Kentucky Oaks and then the Preakness.
Also, because of her popularity, Rachel Alexander was offered a chance to pose in Playhorse magazine

Suspended NFL quarterback Michael Vick will go to work for a construction company in Newport News, Virginia, after he leaves federal prison for bankrolling a dogfighting operation
The owner of the company said that he hired Vick because he felt that hed feel comfortable working in the construction industry, alongside dozens of other criminals

World Wrestling Entertainment says it is moving its Monday night event to Los Angeles because of a conflict with the Pepsi Center in Denver. The Nuggets are scheduled to host the Lakers on Monday in Game 4 of the Western Conference finals, but WWE had previously booked the arena for an episode of Monday Night Raw.
Also announced today, as if to further annoy the WWE, the NBA announced that the head referee for Game 4 would be George the Animal Steele

NASCAR has suspended driver Carl Long for the next 12 Sprint Cup races and fined crew chief Charles Swing $200,000, the largest penalty in the sport’s history.
And to make matters worse, Vivid Video is suing Carl Long and Charles Swing for stealing the names of two of their porn stars

The Los Angeles Clippers won the NBA draft lottery and will have the number one pick
After hearing the news, the fan base was excited, the head coach was happy, and Blake Griffin was suicidal

Tennessee will self-report another minor recruiting violation after a comment about a recruit was posted to coach Lane Kiffin’s Facebook and Twitter accounts.
Even more embarrassing for Kiffin was a comment posted to his facebook and Twitter account about how cute he thinks Adam Lambert is

Phoenix Suns center Shaquille O’Neal is taking a course at Syracuse University known as Sportscaster U, a crash course designed to teach athletes about the broadcasting industry. He arrived on Sunday and started school Monday at the S.I. Newhouse School of Public Communications
O’Neal will be taking three days of classes, which insiders consider the most classes ever attended by an athlete at a major university

NFL teams looking to hire general managers may soon be required to interview at least one minority candidate. Commissioner Roger Goodell said Wednesday the league’s owners discussed expanding the Rooney Rule — which already applies to coaching openings
Goodell also said that he will introduce the McCaffrey rule, which will force every team to interview at least one white wide receiver before finalizing their roster

A woman arrested at Dirk Nowitzki’s house on May 6 says she is pregnant with the child of the Dallas Mavericks’ star and that they had been engaged.
Nowitzki said that he could not have impregnated the woman because, as any of his teammates will tell you, he is soft during the entire NBA season

Penn State head coach Joe Paterno on Tuesday backed off his crusade for Big Ten expansion
Well, to be honest, it wasn’t so much he backed off as it was that he forgot that he ever brought it up

That’s all for this week, leave comments, and remember this is Jarrett Carlen congratulating President Obama on avoiding that ASU degree.

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