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Sports Kabob – 6/23

Ladies and gentlemen (and especially ladies), welcome to the Sports Kabob, a skewered look at the world of sports and pop culture.

Here are the top stories:

France was eliminated from the World Cup a few days after striker Nicolas Anelka had been sent home from the World Cup after allegedly insulting and cursing out his coach and refusing to apologize
It should be pointed out, however, that before cursing out the coach Anelka did say “pardon my French”

USA has advanced to the knockout stage of the World Cup with an extra time goal to defeat Algeria 1-0
American fans say this was the most exciting moment in sports, other than anything else that’s ever happened in any other sport ever

The Marlins fired manager Fredi Gonzalez after 4 seasons
Experts say they knew Gonzalez would be let go after he made critical comments about team officials in an interview with Rolling Stone magazine

Stephen Strasburg broke the major league record for strikeouts over his first four major league starts, fanning nine over his first six innings Thursday for the Washington Nationals against the Kansas City Royals.
In fact, there haven’t been this many people striking out since female groupies first went back stage at a Ricky Martin concert

Pirates communications director Brian Warecki says the team has rehired 24-year-old Andrew Kurtz, who earns $25-per-night to race around the stadium in a pierogi costume. Kurtz was fired last week after using the Internet to criticize contract extensions given to general manager Neal Huntington and manager John Russell.
Warecki was rehired only after General Petraeus turned down the chance to replace him

Jerry Seinfeld called out Lady Gaga for her recent appearances at New York Yankees and Mets games — she flipped dual middle fingers unrepentantly at one game, and showed up in skimpy lingerie for both.
“This woman is a jerk. I hate her,” Seinfeld said on WFAN radio Monday night
Also, in related news, Michael Richards said he is not a fan of Beyonce

ASU was eliminated from the College World Series, becoming the first #1 seed to fail to win a game.
Parents of the Sun Devil players said they haven’t been this disappointed since their children first told them they were going to ASU

Former New York Giant Tiki Barber has been dropped from his contributor’s role on NBC’s “The Today Show.”
Barber will be leaving the program to pursue a younger, hotter show

NASCAR is teaming up with TNT and DirecTV to give fans a new perspective during the circuit’s July visit to Daytona. The 400-mile Cup race at the massive 2.5-mile oval on July 3 will be the first-ever broadcast in 3-D.
NASCAR says its fans will feel as if they are actually at the race, especially if they open the windows to their homes while watching and driving down the highway

Pro Football Hall of Famer Lawrence Taylor was indicted Wednesday by a suburban New York grand jury on charges of third-degree rape and patronizing a prostitute, making Taylor perhaps the most disgraced former football player ever.
In other words, your move OJ

That’s all for this week, leave comments and remember this is Jarrett Carlen, or some people call me, “The human vuvuzela.”

For more of my observations on the world of sports, as well as politics, entertainment and current events, follow me on twitter @JarrettGC.