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Sports Kabob – 11/17

Ladies and gentlemen (and especially ladies), welcome
to the Sports Kabob, a skewered look at the world
of sports and pop culture.

Here are the top stories:

Eva Longoria has filed for divorce from San Antonio Spurs
player Tony Parker after Parker cheated on her.
Wow. If you can’t trust a young, French, rich
professional athlete not to fool around, who can you

Longoria allegedly found hundreds of text messages on
Parker’s phone
from the wife of one of his former teammates Brent Barry.

So Tony Parker cheated on Eva Longoria with
Brent Barry’s wife, which means “former slam dunk
champion” will no longer be the most shocking thing on
Barry’s Wikipedia page.

Parker has not commented on the infidelity rumors or the
This is not surprising. Parker plays on the Spurs and
if you’ve ever seen San Antonio play, you know that none
of their players ever admit to touching anyone.

The University of Oregon is accusing the Cal football team
of faking injuries during their game in order to slow down
the potent Ducks offense.
Cal players deny this accusation, but do admit to
faking injuries on occasion to obtain medical marijuana

Manny Pacquiao defeated Mexico’s Antonio Margarito by
unanimous decision on Saturday.
Pacquiao has now eliminated so many Mexicans he’s
earned the nickname “SB1070.”

San Diego Padres manager Bud Black won MLB Manager of the
Year on Wednesday.
Witnesses say his acceptance speech was going great
but became hard to understand when Black started choking
near the end.

An 8-year-old New York Jets fan was tackled by an adult
Browns fan after Sunday’s game, according to a television
station in Cleveland.
No charges were filed because after all , the kid was
wearing a Lebron James jersey.

Zenyatta officially has been retired and her new home
beginning next month will be Lane’s End Farm near
Versailles, Ky., the farm announced Wednesday.
The farm is a well known place for retired horses. In
fact, that’s where John Kerry went after the 2004

Tiger Woods, in a first-person essay published Wednesday,
said he’s “regaining the balance that I’d lost” before his
car accident a year ago sent his life into a tailspin.
The essay was the first published work by Woods that
didn’t begin with “Dear Penthouse.”

Michael Vick had 6 touchdowns Monday night in the Eagles
win over the Redskins.
Fans in attendance say Vick destroyed the Redskins like
they were a pitbull he lost money on.

That’s all for this week, leave comments, follow me on
Twitter and remember this is Jarrett Carlen saying if only
Prince William had waited a few more days he could have
had Eva Longoria.

For more of my observations on the world of sports, as
well as politics, entertainment and current events, follow
me on twitter