Best Arizona Sports Haboobs of 2017
Dec 30, 2017, 7:30 AM
We watch sports because of the emotion.
There are highs and lows. There are feelings of local pride and torment when losing happens. But fans also follow sports because, lots of times, we experience ridiculously hilarious things about men and women who are supposed to be our idols.
With the year coming to an end, we skimmed through our Haboob Blog to find some of the more memorable stories — both local and national — that were too damn funny. We present our best Haboobs of 2017.
Drinking paint: Not healthy
Let’s make this short and sweet: Don’t drink paint. Just ask Cardinals coach Bruce Arians, who revealed in his book that he used to drink the stuff because — quite logically — he couldn’t drink milk. And he did it MULTIPLE TIMES.
Get shredded like this old bro ref, bro
Big 12 ref Mike Defee looked well prepared to throw down against relatively anemic-looking college football players in the Clemson-Alabama National Championship game. People cared more about Mr. Defee than that clash of national powers.
One man said he’d get an Archie Bradley tattoo if he plated a run during the D-backs’ Wild Card game against the Colorado Rockies. Bradley did just that with a historic triple, then told the fan he’d better follow through. The lesson: Don’t make promises you can’t keep.
Right where it hurts
First pitches go badly all the time. They can be embarrassing. But this one was so bad that it got one unsuspecting photographer right where it hurts.
Shaq’s toe is disgusting
Someone get this man a pedicure! 😱😂 pic.twitter.com/SFCjnq7XV7
— NBA on TNT (@NBAonTNT) May 26, 2017
On one fateful edition of Inside the NBA, we learned that Shaquille O’Neal’s big toe is not normal. Taking off his shoes and socks, he showed the world just how not normal it was.
Remember to clean the whiteboard
The Orlando Magic signed a dude named Patricio Garino, and Garino’s agent snapped a picture of the contract becoming official, then posted it to social media. That’s nice. What’s not nice is that, in the background, he captured Orlando’s office whiteboard with a list of potential trade targets and free agents that we assume the Magic were interested in.
D-backs beat Cubs in a dance-off
Who says rain delays are boring? #Dbacks #Cubs @MLBonFOX pic.twitter.com/uZeVP9iVW7
— FOX Sports Arizona (@FOXSPORTSAZ) August 3, 2017
During a rain delay, what’s a bullpen to do? Well, the Diamondbacks and Cubs challenged one another to choreographed routines during one game in Chicago. It. Was. Epic.
Danny Ainge is grumpy
After the Suns picked Josh Jackson fourth overall in the 2017 NBA Draft, the man with the third pick, Boston’s Danny Ainge, wasn’t super happy. In fact, he used his post-draft press conference not so much to talk about the Celtics’ pick, Jayson Tatum, but the fact that Jackson made Ainge fly across the country for no reason in the draft process before Jackson cancelled a workout.
Sad Padres fans are sad
Erick Aybar is the best pitcher we have!! pic.twitter.com/sLM0FQl75d
— Joel Padilla (@JoelPadilla) April 19, 2017
Erick Aybar had to pitch against the Arizona Diamondbacks. He’s a shortstop for the San Diego Padres. Padres fans accepted the reality of their team being pretty bad and enjoyed it.
The Freeze will beat you
Beat the Freeze ⚾️ #MLB ⚡️ in disguise. #SaturdayMorning pic.twitter.com/4nkCSig09H
— Grande (@Beeznuzz) June 10, 2017
Few pro athletes had a better season than The Freeze. Part of the Atlanta Braves’ between-inning entertainment, The Freeze gave opponents head starts in running around the warning track. Then, he would catch up and, usually, beat them.
Here’s what your jump balls look like
Isaiah Thomas vs @tulis3 : The World’s Smallest Jump Ball. #WeArePHX pic.twitter.com/os0ebFwjbX
— Cody Cunningham (@Cody_Cunningham) March 5, 2017
Here’s to guessing this was collectively the shortest jump ball in NBA history. Tyler Ulis and Isaiah Thomas, who are both shy of 6-foot, had to jump it up as the Suns faced the Celtics. Some called it cute. Others called it adorable. We’ll call it awesome.