Dallas restaurant chain offers Dwight Howard free chicken fingers for life

Jun 30, 2013, 10:03 PM | Updated: Jul 1, 2013, 6:16 am
Follow @AZSports...

When the NBA Free Agency period officially gets underway Sunday night at 9:00 p.m. MST, center Dwight Howard will be the center of attention, with teams like the Dallas Mavericks, Golden State Warriors, Houston Rockets and Los Angeles Lakers vying for his long-term services.

While the seven-time All-Star will more than likely be offered a max contract in the coming days or weeks, one local establishment in Dallas is doing everything it can to strengthen Mark Cuban and Co.’s sales pitch.

Taking a page out of the Lakers’ playbook, Raising Cane’s, which has 20 locations in the Dallas-Fort Worth area, has recently put up billboards trying to lure Howard to sign with Mavericks.

If he does, the fast food chain promised to give the 27-year-old free chicken fingers for life.

The story got big enough in Big D, that local sports reporter
Brad Townsend of the Dallas-Morning News broke down the potential offer.

Howard is 27. The average American male life expectancy is 76. That would be 49 years – 2,548 weeks – of free grub for Howard.

Figure the least he would order in one sitting would be the Caniac 6-finger combo, which is $10.80 including tax. Surely, though, an athlete of Howard’s size would have no problem downing the 25-piece Tailgate box, which goes for $29.75 including tax.

If Howard ate one Caniac a week for 49 years, it would cost Cane’s a reasonable $27,518.40. One Tailgate order per week would extrapolate to $75,803.

But if Howard really took advantage and hit the drive-through every day, he’d amass $192,628 worth of Caniacs, $530,621 worth of Tailgates.

If the latter occurred, Cane’s would be lending the Mavericks far more than a hand in landing Howard – 445,900 chicken fingers, actually.

Not word yet on whether the chicken fingers would count against the Mavericks’ cap space.

Penguin Air

Comments

Comment guidelines: No name-calling, personal attacks, profanity, or insults. Please keep the conversation civil and help us moderate comments by reporting abuse.
comments powered by Disqus

Haboob

Arizona Cardinals defensive end J.J. Watt walks the sideline during the team's NFL football preseas...
Haboob Blog

Cardinals’ J.J. Watt encounters ‘baby rattlesnake’ in bathroom

Cardinals defensive lineman J.J. Watt found himself in a situation many who call Arizona home never wish to be in. Or at least he thought so.
3 days ago
Arizona Cardinals DL Manny Jones runs through drills during OTAs on Monday, May 23, 2022, in Tempe....
Tyler Drake

Is that K1? Manny Jones stole Cardinals’ rookie show with Kyler Murray skit

Cardinals DL Manny Jones' impression of Kyler Murray for the rookie talent show on Tuesday had the team doubled over in laughter.
6 days ago
Pittsburgh Pirates' Rodolfo Castro, left, watches along with Los Angeles Dodgers catcher Austin Bar...
Haboob Blog

Pirates’ Rodolfo Castro loses phone while sliding into 3rd base at Chase Field

Now here's something you don't see very often on the diamond: a cell phone popping out of a players back pocket mid-game.
7 days ago
(Twitter screenshot/@BuffaloBills)...
Haboob Blog

Case Keenum acts as fan to get teammates’ autographs at Bills camp

Buffalo Bills backup QB Case Keenum went undercover at training camp to try to get as many of his teammates' autographs without them noticing.
7 days ago
Arizona State quarterback Mike Bercovici celebrates a touchdown pass against West Virginia during t...
Tyler Drake

Not even Cardinals’ Kliff Kingsbury can 1-up Mike Bercovici in Scottsdale

Mike Bercovici might be early into his Cardinals coaching career, but he's still got his head coach beat when it comes to the local scene.
7 days ago
(Twitter screenshot/Rhett Bollinger)...
Haboob Blog

D-backs 3B Josh Rojas’ picture gets mistaken for Angels’ Jose Rojas

It's ok Arizona Diamondbacks fans, Josh Rojas has not been traded away and bats leadoff for Saturday's game against the Colorado Rockies.
10 days ago
Dallas restaurant chain offers Dwight Howard free chicken fingers for life